Saturday, March 28, 2015

Left Behind

The time comes every once in a while.
While waiting, I compile all my file.
File of stories I found worthwhile.
Because the time only comes once in a while.

The time comes and I put on a smile.
"How is your life? It's been a while."
She told me, "Life is fine, not so vile."
"More mobile, and less labile."

She asked me back just like a good friend will.
I tried to grin and make my story a thrill.
But a caveman life is an exile.
It would be lie to say otherwise.

Feelings of unsure I wanted to pour
on someone who I know won't ignore.
But don't want to be an eyesore, someone she abhors.
Better keep the sore myself forevermore.

Day by day I feel further away
from the place she now stays.
A mile a day I walk the speedway.
Never mind winning the race; just want to finish it one day.

Monday, December 1, 2014

A Strange Girl

I have been stunned, stupefied, bewildered by a girl, a strange girl, a girl whose name I haven't known, voice I haven't heard, skin I haven't touched.
And friends, I am not a literate fool by using the words "stunned", "stupefied" and "bewildered" in the same sentence, side by side.

She did stun me. The first time I saw her, it was in a tea party. There were many girls around her, many of those were arousing, but she, she was just a petite 5' tall girl with her t-shirt and jeans. I didn't notice her at first. It couldn't be helped, she wasn't advertising her curves like every other girls. But once I saw her, I couldn't look away. Obviously I wasn't continuously staring at her. That would be creepy. I tried to do it more subtle. I occasionally looked other directions, but in the end, my eyes always returned to her. Now, you might wonder what's special about this girl. Truth be told, I couldn't explain it either. I think I could only say that I admired the texture of her face. Her dark hair was tied back in a ponytail, exposing her vulnerable ears. Her pinkish lips were thin, and when her upper-lip met her underlip, they fashion a tiny straight line that I wish I could touch with my own lips. Her nose wasn't sharp, but I would love to pinch it while telling her a joke. Her eyes though, there's something in her eyes. Her eyes were big, considering her small snowy face. Her eyebrows were sharp and crowded like a black forest. While her eyelashes weren't curled up, they perfectly decorated her vivid eyes. All together, they sent a challenge to whoever dared to look at them. And I, I wasn't dared enough.

She stupefied me. I was in the library, doing an errand. The lifeless library encouraged me to finish promptly whatever I was doing. Then, I saw her alone in a table. The table was in a mess. I guessed she was writing an essay for her class. I stopped awkwardly to appreciate her beauty. My eyes dilated, and I stared at her. I think she sensed it because she glanced back at me. I tried to keep it cool, but I think I wasn't successful. She looked back at her paper. Perhaps she was shy, or perhaps she wasn't even looking at me. I would never know, because I left immediately telling myself I had something urgent to do.

She bewildered me. I saw her again in the library. The library hadn't changed, it's still lifeless. But she, she changed. She's still a petite girl and all, but then, her attributes looked bolder. She wore a black yoga pants priding her healthy legs. She still wore a T-shirt, but now her bosom was depicted exquisitely by that over-sized fabric. My attitude hadn't changed. I still sneakily inappropriately appreciated her beauty. I found her amusing. Although her beauty was angelic, she had the character of another teenager. When doing her work, she occasionally checked her phone and slouched on her chair. Not very charismatic, but was still charming in her own way. I overheard her conversation with her friend, which was the first time I heard her voice. Her voice too, wasn't peculiar, but when I heard her laugh, I felt my heart skipped a bit.

At night, I couldn't sleep thinking of her. So I closed my eyes, and secretly made her mine. I sincerely yet pervertedly hope I could get to dream about her.

Sunday, November 9, 2014

Cohabitation In Indonesia

Cohabitation simply means a couple living together before marriage. I believe it is common in many western countries, but it is one that is considered taboo and punishable in my lovely country Indonesia. Before coming to USA, I was always taught that cohabitation is immoral, simply because a couple only can live together if they are married. Yet, my opinion slowly shifted since I came to USA.

Cohabitation might or might not damage marriage, but for the love of God, even if it is damaging to the marriage, the Indonesian government doesn't have the right (shouldn't have the right) to intervene! Seriously though, smoking cigarettes are far more dangerous than cohabitation, but the government doesn't ban it. The only reason cohabitation is condemned, is because of the tradition, and we (smart people) all know that tradition makes a bad law.

There's a book called "Let's Talk about Love", and it tries to argue why cohabitation is wrong and should be punished, either directly or indirectly. Here are the arguments:

1. The couple will feel sinful because you soon will realize that your religion prohibits it.
Alright, I think it should be clear that religion matter should be a personal matter. My religion might prohibits it, but who the hell are you to stop me from crossing the line? If it is wrong, let God decides what punishment God will put upon me. Furthermore, my God might think that it is okay to cohabit.

2. You will worry that you partner will leave you.
I mean, seriously, I think married couple also sometimes can worry that their partner will leave them. Obviously, after marriage, it is harder to leave the relationship. However, here is the thing, do you really want your partner to stay with you just because it is hard for him/her to have a divorce? That is just stupid. Yes, in cohabitation it is easier for your partner to leave you compared with in marriage, but in both cases, your partner still can leave you, so deal with it.

3. You will be haunted by the possibility of having a baby.
Not if you understand contraception. To be fair, the risk will always be there. However, are we really going to punish people because they are having sex? Well, I would prefer if we punish people who aren't responsible after having sex. The difference is that, it doesn't matter whether you are married or not, if you have sex and it results in pregnancy or a baby (child), you should be responsible! I mean, there is a married couple that don't take care of their baby, and we should punish them. We should not just blatantly punish people because they are having sex without certification (seriously though, "you need certification to have sex" sounds extremely stupid). The evil does't have to be the unmarried couple.

4. Even if the unmarried (cohabited) couple can accept the baby, there will be social prejudice and uncertainty in the status of the baby in the law.
You know what is wrong? The social prejudice and the law, those, we should change. I mean, seriously though, are we really going to accept every social prejudice?

5. People will start talking bad things about you. Worse, they will exclude you.
HaHaHa.. Again, the problem with this is the PEOPLE! It really just shows how Indonesian people are so self-righteous.

I personally will prefer all people to live together after they marry, and value having sex not just a tool for pleasure, but all of those are just my preferences and law should not be based on preferences!
(It will be godly good though if I can ban smoking for good)

Link for the book "Let's Talk about Love" : Here!
The article is in Indonesian though..

Saturday, November 1, 2014

A Kid With No Flesh

Everyday there's a kid with no flesh, only bones.
Everyday there's someone taking a picture of a kid with no flesh.
Everyday there's someone who saw the picture of a kid with no flesh, and did nothing .
The kid cried and cried. Hardly had liquid in his body, his cry brought no tears.
Nonetheless, it's still a cry , a cry for help.
The photographer saw the kid. Yet, he saw something more in the kid.
He saw a kid who needs help, and he saw a way for him to fame.
The photographer told the kid, "Fear not, I will bring you hope."
So he took the picture, and left.
He told himself, "The most thing I can do, is to spread the story of a kid with no flesh."
The story spread. The picture's published. People gathered. Money's collected.
The money went to the system. The money's transferred.
However, it didn't reach the kid with no flesh.
The kid was no longer the kid with no flesh. He was then, the kid with no life.
He needed not hope. He needed food.
Yet, people gave him hope, and the food came late.
Preachers preached, "The kid's now in a better place. Heaven, with God. Let us pray for this to not happen again."
Thus, they prayed. They cried.
They put their hands up, and mumbled sacred words as they liked to describe it.
They felt guilt in their heart.
They spread the news and they tried hard.
They told themselves, "The most thing I can do, is to spread the story of a kid with no flesh."

Sunday, October 26, 2014

It Pisses Me Off

It pisses me off,
when I try so hard,
sweat so bad,
but the result is off.

It pisses me off,
when he comes after me,
struggles less than me,
but gets the payoff.

It pisses me off,
when I see him smile,
claiming her shrine.
That should be mine.